Apple Picking

Yesterday we had the quintessential fall experience: apple picking!  Every year I get this yearning, and this year was no different.  Even in Iowa and Missouri, I had to find orchards to fulfill my craving.  This year we were here in MN and the choices were abundant.  We chose to go to Minnetonka Orchards. It was a great place, maybe too many bees, but that's a little hard to control, seeing how you need bees in the first place to make the apples.

Last year my family went by ourselves, but this year we were lucky enough to go with my sister and my two good friends.  It made it much more enjoyable for the kids and also tired us out quite well.  I know my kids slept well. 

I brought my camera with and got a ton of good pictures. Man these kids are photogenic.  It makes my job easy.  I tried to pare them down to a reasonable level for this blog.  If it is still too much, well sorry about that.

 For book recommendations, I have a list going on in my phone. When ever I hear the same things from two different people, that book goes to the top of my list. This just happened and I'm glad it did.

One of my friends was reading The Artist's Way by something Cameron and then when I was talking to another friend they mentioned there was the same book for kids.  I don't know where I heard it, but somewhere someone said the secret of happiness is creativity.  I think that is true.  Well, then, I should probably strive to be more creative for me and for my kids.

I think with raising kids, it is hard to narrow down what to focus on.  We can make sure they are working hard on their academics, or sports, or manners, or music, or free play, or many many other things.  I find myself overwhelmed.  I, of course, want to give all the tools necessary for my kids to become successful adults, but life is short on time and energy.

If I think creativity is so important and it can make people happy, then why don't I read this book?  Well, I have started and I am quite impressed.  So impressed, Aaron and I will strive to make this semester all about creativity.  Henry is excited about what is to come. He loves creating and crafting.  Franny will go along with anything as long as it appears we are all having fun.

I've only read the preface and the first chapter, but I have the jist of what to do.  To teach creativity to your own child, you have to start with yourself.  That makes sense.  The author referred to putting on your own oxygen mask in a plane before you put one on your kids. To fully do this, she wants the adults to write in a journal every morning for three pages. It has to be long hand and it has to be only for your eyes.  This way the intention is only for you. 

 The next step is to have creative adventures with your kids once a week. It can be small things like a craft at home, or more intentional like an art museum.  I really like the thought of this. I have already brainstormed about 30 or so activities for my family.

 The first of these was apple picking.  While I was there, I was paying attention to an open agenda and letting my kids decide a lot of the choices.  The clearing my mind of a concrete plan on how to tackle the apple orchard,  it made me able to enjoy more of the details and the individual qualities of everyone. I like having a plan and I need to remember that it is okay not to have one.

 I also bought the kids some blank journal where they can summarize the adventures with words or pictures.  They are not here yet, but I hope to use them for the next adventure.

 The last step of The Artist's Way is checking in with your kid and recapping the day. What went well, not so well, what was fun, etc.  It helps the kids learn to communicate and I think its good for bonding.  We kind of do this anyway during dinner, although Henry is pretty mum, even with open ended questions.

 To be honest, I think I'm going to start with 2/3.  Right now, I am going to focus on the latter two parts. I am exercising in the morning sometimes and I don't want to take that away.  Exercising clears my mind and prepares me for the day, so in a way, they are kind of the same, right?

 So for our next adventures, we have a couple things planned.  My friend told me she was going to bake an apple pie on the first day of fall (next Wednesday).  Henry thought that was a great idea, so we will be doing it too, all together.

 Then sometime next week, we will go to the aquarium. Besides seeing all the cool fish, our goal will be to try to find fish all the colors of the rainbow and maybe sketch them in our adventure book if it comes in time. 

 Off the top of my head, the other things we might do is: playground expresss, zoo, cookie challenge,  Minneapolis instute of art, sculpture garden, nature walk with leaf collections, and make play-doh.

 I like the thought about thinking what the kids would enjoy and what I would and trying to squeeze it in during the week.  Aaron is also for this, but as of right now I am spear heading it.

 Oh, speaking of Aaron, he could not come to pick apples because he had his final 1860's rule baseball game.  It was perfect weather and he played well.  I'm glad Aaron could find some baseball nerds like himself.  Minneapolis is a big city, you just have to hunt to find people. 

 I think Aaron plans on playing next year too. We only went to one game of his during the season. Hopefully we can go to more next year.  Maybe we need some period outfits too...hmmmm.

 For Halloween I have already agreed to sew costumes for Henry and Franny.  I suppose I could add in some old timey clothes as well.  That is, if I ever get down to the sewing machine.

 Well, I did it, I managed to write words between every picture.  Hope you enjoyed our first adventure!

One Year after an Acoustic Neuroma

Aaron has done a great job recapping all that we did this summer.  Instead of continuing the summations, I am writing to fixate on one day, one scary day one year ago on the 11th of this month.

I knew something was wrong with me. I went to a specialist and tried to have them convince me it was not an acoustic neuroma. They couldn't, and so ordered an MRI. After I got the scan, I made the mistake of looking at the MRI without an official reading.  I don't think any physicians could wait for an official read while the results are in their hand (CD).  When I looked at the scan, I saw something HUGE.  That evening was the scariest night of my life.  As soon as I got home from work I grabbed Aaron's hand and I don't think I let go for 16 hours or so (even at night).  Scary end of life thoughts were flitting through my head at an uncontrolled pace.  Those thoughts always came back to my kids and family.

Now flash forward a year.  Through brain surgery, five days in the hospital and months recovering at home, past 6 weeks of radiation with fatigue clicking up a notch every time the invisible rays flitted through my skull, past somnolence syndrome and then weeks of steroid treatment needed control its symptoms. Past it all

Now it's fall.

I feel pretty normal.  I've realized now that the daily headache I was so used to, now has vanished.  The headache after exercise is also gone. I still have headaches, but they are sporadic and they are not needing medication. This is a HUGE improvement that just crept up on me. I only noticed it because I was reflecting on this anniversary.  My right ear hearing is trashed, but with a hearing aid, things are manageable. My balance is pretty good, but during the twilight hours it is harder to balance.  When I spin at all or look far to the right, the room will still spin.  Even the thought of a roller coaster sends a little nausea bubble to my stomach. I used to love those things!  I can ride a bike, I read well, and do so often.  I now have started going back to the gym and am even incorporating weights into my routine.  If you saw me on the street, you would  never know.

Through all this, I have learned to be kind.  It does reiterate that everyone has their own silent struggles. But for me, the kindness was more to myself. All in all, I have done damn well.  Sure, there have been a few set backs and mistakes, but I need to forgive myself and allow the slow ascent back to normalcy.

I remember scouring websites looking for acoustic neuroma stories.  I knew everyone was different, but I wanted a hint of what things were to come .  I also craved personalization, where all of the facts I read about were sterile and comparing hundreds of people.  I needed one.  Maybe I will be that one for someone. If I am, or if anyone else wants to know...I am okay.

The Summer of '15

April 13—July 12: Henry Baseball

Henry will tell you he doesn't like playing baseball, but when he's on the field he generally has a smile on his face or is doing a happy dance. It is a big time commitment for a seven year old who would stay at home playing Wii all day if he could, but the kid can really swing the bat and loves hitting the ball. Still afraid of the ball out in the field, but he did have one incredible inning at third base when he made three putouts. (Might have been his only three putouts of the year?) The machine-pitch Rockies had great coaches and a great group of boys that Henry loved to play with (even if he didn't always know it). I (Aaron) got to help out as a coach here and there, and if there is a heaven, I hope it includes getting to play baseball with kids. I saw every game except the last one, in which Henry hit a grand slam. They start keeping score next year. Not sure I'm ready for that.

May 23—25: Omaha

Laura already did a post on our Omaha trip, but it was a great kickoff to an action packed summer. Time with John, Sarah, Luke, and Cole, a rainy but fun Storm Chasers game, the zoo, and A HOTEL! Our kids think staying at hotels is about the coolest thing.

June 4—July 9: Frances's Amazing Athletes Class

Franny did five sessions at the Minnetonka Community Education Center (MCEC) in a great class that incorporated warm-up exercises, a little yoga, and basic introduction to all sorts of sports (football, tennis, lacrosse, baseball, hockey, soccer) and she loved it. She surprised me sometimes with how well she could throw, shoot a puck, etc.

June 8: Henry's Last Day of 1st Grade

Henry had an excellent teacher, Sra. Albina, who was amazingly perceptive and responsive to Henry's strengths and needs. Hanky got pulled out of class for lots of things this year: two "academic extension" classes (math and reading), a visit with the school counselor (suggested by Sra. Albina) after Laura's surgery just to check in and make sure he was handling it OK, Project Primary (suggested by Sra. Albina) to work on social skills and self-confidence, and a few sessions of speech (after an assessment recommended by Sra. Albina) at the end of the year (which will continue in 2nd grade). The level of care for Henry at Clear Springs has been touching and reassuring. Hanky would occasionally complain about not liking school, but was almost always happy to be dropped off in the morning and happy when picked up in the afternoon. Just like his Kindergarten teacher, Sra. Albina is not coming back to Clear Springs, and we'll miss them both. Henry said he hopes his 3rd grade teacher sticks around. Franny and I went to a little last day party on the playground (where I thought I was taking pictures but didn't have the memory card in the camera).

June 9—July 21: Henry's Playground Group

Minnetonka has a free summer program for kids to be supervised at playgrounds in the mornings, and Henry made it probably half the time or more down to Boulder Creek Park. He didn't know any other kids and was worried about that, but made a friend on the first day named Jack. Jack brought his Yugi-Oh cards, so Henry had an in. Henry brought his Yugi-Oh and Pokemon cards every time he went to the park from then on, and shadowed Jack. I was a little disappointed that Henry seemed to sit out of just about all physical activity in favor of sitting and looking at cards all morning each time he went, and that he felt lost on the few days Jack wasn't there, but it's a great program for getting him outside and letting someone else take care of him for a bit.

walking home from "Bolber" Creek (as Fran says)

June 10: End of School Beach Party

Laura organized a picnic at the beach to celebrate the end of school with Malcolm, Ruby, Mim, Lottie, Renae, Sarah, and Val, but then was feeling awful with her somnolence syndrome so didn't even get to go. But the kids had a great time.

June 14, July 4, 11: Aaron's Quicksteps Vintage Base Ball

I joined a vintage base ball team playing by the rules of the 1860s. Most of the games were too far away or I had conflicts with, but when I managed to make it to a game, it was super fun. Our softball team didn't come together this summer, so it was great to get to play a little ball. I imagine I'll keep playing for a long time, health willing.

June 17: Cousins Photo Shoot For Grandpa's Father's Day Present

June 20—26: Stilley Vacation at Gull Lake

The extended Stilley clan spent a wonderful week together near Brainerd, MN. Laura was still a little zapped from somnolence syndrome, but it was otherwise an idyllic trip. The cousins played fantastically well together (not always the case on previous trips!) which allowed the adults to enjoy ourselves too. Jenny and my mom came up with a great itinerary before the trip that had us going to the Safari North zoo, canoeing on the Mississippi, Paul Bunyan Land amusement park, a day on a pontoon, roasting marshmallows, relaxing at the rental home, getting lost on a hike, lunch and turtle racing in Nisswa, taking turns cooking, etc., etc. I'm usually ready to be done even at the end of good trips, but I could have stayed a few more days on this one.

On our way back home we stopped at the Charles A. Lindbergh Home in Little Falls, and Grammy & Poppy stayed a couple of extra days with us in Minnetonka.

June 29—July 9: Henry & Frances Swim Lessons at Foss

Both kids did a two week/eight lesson swim camp at the same time but in separate classes. Henry really took to the water this summer more than he ever had, and loved his lessons. Franny had a harder time, particularly on the first day when she pretty much decided she wasn't going to do anything but sit in the pool with her head down and cry. Things got a lot better from there, but she was still fairly reticent for most of the lessons. She did get to the point where she'd blow some bubbles and float on her back, so some progress was made. Henry couldn't get enough swimming all summer, and by request is doing more lessons at Foss this fall.

July 4—5: Staycation in St. Paul

The kids had been begging us to go to another hotel ever since Omaha, so we decided to try something we'd never done: a night at a hotel in town! We settled on the Embassy Suites in downtown St. Paul, which proved to be a good spot. The first order of business was swimming, then we walked to Mickey's Diner for dinner, then back to the room for lots of TV watching. In the morning it was a hotel breakfast, more swimming, and then to lunch at Lord Fletcher's with the Solyntjes clan.

July 9: The Craziest Day of the Summer

I intentionally scheduled the kids pretty full this summer (with breaks built in too), and it worked out great, except for one day. Every activity seemed to overlap on July 9. Franny had a ballet camp start in the morning, then they both had swim lessons in the early afternoon. Franny squeezed in a post-lunch nap, and I gave her the option of going to the final Amazing Athletes session. She wanted to! So we did that in the mid-afternoon, grabbed a quick bite at Wendy's, dropped Henry off at baseball practice, took Franny back home to be with Mom, then went back to pick up Henry. It actually worked out fine, just too much driving time for Dad.

July 9—30: Franny's Frozen Ballet Camp at MCEC

Franny was in heaven at these four ballet classes, dancing to songs from Frozen. I unfortunately couldn't see her while she was dancing, but she was always beaming after class and would show me some moves when we got home. There was 10 minutes at the end of the last class where family got to go in and watch. Pretty adorable. Ballet is definitely her top choice of activities right now.

July 11: Henry & Laura's Tonka Mud Run

July 13: Morrissey

Laura and me tried out this weird thing where we go out without the kids. We saw Morrissey at the Fitzgerald Theater in St. Paul, and it was nice to get out, but we were both a little disappointed with the show. It had its moments, but something was missing compared to the other two times I've seen him.

July 20—24: Henry's Cartoon Camp

This was a four day camp at Scenic Heights Elementary at which Henry drew a different comic book every day. He enjoyed it well enough, but it seemed to just be rote copying of what the teacher showed them to draw.

July 25: Henry & Mama Archery

July 26: Malcolm B-Day Party/Trivia

After a fun birthday at the park for Malcolm, the kids stayed with Grandma & Grandpa while Mom & Dad played some trivia with softball cronies. Good times plus a victory!

July 27—31: Henry's Viking Saga Camp at The Oakshott Institute

This was an all-day, five day camp. It was right up Henry's alley, run by experts on Viking history and featuring history lessons, making his own shield, and Viking-inspired games such as javelin throwing, dodge ball with shields, axe throwing, and sword fights. The downside for Dad was having to fight rush hour traffic way across town twice a day. Henry better hope I forget how much I hated the driving by the time we need to sign up for next year's Oakshott camps. By luck, his buddy Huxley was signed up for the camp too.

August 5: Frances's Princess Art Class at MCEC

A one-morning art class. I screwed this one up a little by telling Frances I'd be staying at the class with her, assuming for some reason it was a parent-child class. All her other art classes had been! But when we got there it was a room full of little girls and one teacher. No parents. Uh-oh. I tried to explain to Franny, but she started melting down, so I told her I'd stay for 10 minutes or so. Cue 10 minutes of awkward sitting in the corner while the young teacher starts the class, but at least Franny is happy and participating. I say my goodbye quickly, at which point she starts melting down again, but I take off. I was 93% sure she would get over it quickly, and we found out later she did. Overall, a success. Maybe a preview of how preschool drop-off will go for awhile.

August 8—15: Solyntjes Vacation at Lake Shamineau

Our families independently both chose lake homes near Brainerd for get-aways this summer, but that was fine with us! We figured we'd end up repeating some of the same activities, but we didn't. Between swimming, playing on the beach, mini-golf, go-karts, fishing, pinball, kayaking, golf, cards, relaxing at the cabin, a campfire, and meteor watching, there was plenty to keep everyone happy. I inexplicably got really sick one day, but luckily no one else did. Franny was very attached herself to Aunt Emily all week! More great family time.

August 17—21: Henry Golf Lessons at Glen Lake

Hard to get much out of Hanky about this camp except that it was "good." He and Franny both liked getting Icees in the clubhouses after most lessons.

August 22—September 1: Aaron, Henry & Franny Trip To Kansas City/Laura Has Too Much Fun By Herself At Home

The end of summer trip to Grammy & Poppy's house seems to be a yearly tradition now, with no activities offered for the end of August and school not starting until after Labor Day. Laura didn't make it down for any of the time this year, but she was happy to have so much time all to herself. She tried out cooking complicated Indian dishes, kayaked the St. Croix River with Jackie, went to a ballet with Jackie, watched whatever movies she wanted, and probably other stuff too. I didn't have it so bad either with built-in babysitters, and got out to a Royals game with just John and a great stand-up comedy festival on my birthday with friends. With the kids, we did the zoo, a Royals game, Deanna Rose Farmstead, Oklahoma Joe's, swimming, pontoon, cards, visited Granddaddy in Liberty, and played with cousins and Grammy and Poppy to their heart's content. Just Henry and Poppy spent a long afternoon at Cool Crest playing mini-golf and arcade games.

September 5: Renaissance Festival

This is the third summer in a row we've gone to the Ren Fest, mostly because there's a few things for both kids that they just love. For Franny, that's the Fairy Forest and the mermaids, and for Henry, shooting arrows, throwing stars, and getting to pick out a souvenir. Franny chose a garland for her hair and Henry a wooden sword. We went with Sarah, Mim, Lottie, and their Grandma Sue and had a good time, if tempered by the crowd and heat. As we fought an exhausted, screaming Franny to buckle up in the car afterwards, we thought it might be OK to take a break from this activity next summer.

September 8: Henry's First Day of 2nd Grade

(And Franny's first day of pre-school coming up on September 15.)