The Summer of '15

April 13—July 12: Henry Baseball

Henry will tell you he doesn't like playing baseball, but when he's on the field he generally has a smile on his face or is doing a happy dance. It is a big time commitment for a seven year old who would stay at home playing Wii all day if he could, but the kid can really swing the bat and loves hitting the ball. Still afraid of the ball out in the field, but he did have one incredible inning at third base when he made three putouts. (Might have been his only three putouts of the year?) The machine-pitch Rockies had great coaches and a great group of boys that Henry loved to play with (even if he didn't always know it). I (Aaron) got to help out as a coach here and there, and if there is a heaven, I hope it includes getting to play baseball with kids. I saw every game except the last one, in which Henry hit a grand slam. They start keeping score next year. Not sure I'm ready for that.

May 23—25: Omaha

Laura already did a post on our Omaha trip, but it was a great kickoff to an action packed summer. Time with John, Sarah, Luke, and Cole, a rainy but fun Storm Chasers game, the zoo, and A HOTEL! Our kids think staying at hotels is about the coolest thing.

June 4—July 9: Frances's Amazing Athletes Class

Franny did five sessions at the Minnetonka Community Education Center (MCEC) in a great class that incorporated warm-up exercises, a little yoga, and basic introduction to all sorts of sports (football, tennis, lacrosse, baseball, hockey, soccer) and she loved it. She surprised me sometimes with how well she could throw, shoot a puck, etc.

June 8: Henry's Last Day of 1st Grade

Henry had an excellent teacher, Sra. Albina, who was amazingly perceptive and responsive to Henry's strengths and needs. Hanky got pulled out of class for lots of things this year: two "academic extension" classes (math and reading), a visit with the school counselor (suggested by Sra. Albina) after Laura's surgery just to check in and make sure he was handling it OK, Project Primary (suggested by Sra. Albina) to work on social skills and self-confidence, and a few sessions of speech (after an assessment recommended by Sra. Albina) at the end of the year (which will continue in 2nd grade). The level of care for Henry at Clear Springs has been touching and reassuring. Hanky would occasionally complain about not liking school, but was almost always happy to be dropped off in the morning and happy when picked up in the afternoon. Just like his Kindergarten teacher, Sra. Albina is not coming back to Clear Springs, and we'll miss them both. Henry said he hopes his 3rd grade teacher sticks around. Franny and I went to a little last day party on the playground (where I thought I was taking pictures but didn't have the memory card in the camera).

June 9—July 21: Henry's Playground Group

Minnetonka has a free summer program for kids to be supervised at playgrounds in the mornings, and Henry made it probably half the time or more down to Boulder Creek Park. He didn't know any other kids and was worried about that, but made a friend on the first day named Jack. Jack brought his Yugi-Oh cards, so Henry had an in. Henry brought his Yugi-Oh and Pokemon cards every time he went to the park from then on, and shadowed Jack. I was a little disappointed that Henry seemed to sit out of just about all physical activity in favor of sitting and looking at cards all morning each time he went, and that he felt lost on the few days Jack wasn't there, but it's a great program for getting him outside and letting someone else take care of him for a bit.

walking home from "Bolber" Creek (as Fran says)

June 10: End of School Beach Party

Laura organized a picnic at the beach to celebrate the end of school with Malcolm, Ruby, Mim, Lottie, Renae, Sarah, and Val, but then was feeling awful with her somnolence syndrome so didn't even get to go. But the kids had a great time.

June 14, July 4, 11: Aaron's Quicksteps Vintage Base Ball

I joined a vintage base ball team playing by the rules of the 1860s. Most of the games were too far away or I had conflicts with, but when I managed to make it to a game, it was super fun. Our softball team didn't come together this summer, so it was great to get to play a little ball. I imagine I'll keep playing for a long time, health willing.

June 17: Cousins Photo Shoot For Grandpa's Father's Day Present

June 20—26: Stilley Vacation at Gull Lake

The extended Stilley clan spent a wonderful week together near Brainerd, MN. Laura was still a little zapped from somnolence syndrome, but it was otherwise an idyllic trip. The cousins played fantastically well together (not always the case on previous trips!) which allowed the adults to enjoy ourselves too. Jenny and my mom came up with a great itinerary before the trip that had us going to the Safari North zoo, canoeing on the Mississippi, Paul Bunyan Land amusement park, a day on a pontoon, roasting marshmallows, relaxing at the rental home, getting lost on a hike, lunch and turtle racing in Nisswa, taking turns cooking, etc., etc. I'm usually ready to be done even at the end of good trips, but I could have stayed a few more days on this one.

On our way back home we stopped at the Charles A. Lindbergh Home in Little Falls, and Grammy & Poppy stayed a couple of extra days with us in Minnetonka.

June 29—July 9: Henry & Frances Swim Lessons at Foss

Both kids did a two week/eight lesson swim camp at the same time but in separate classes. Henry really took to the water this summer more than he ever had, and loved his lessons. Franny had a harder time, particularly on the first day when she pretty much decided she wasn't going to do anything but sit in the pool with her head down and cry. Things got a lot better from there, but she was still fairly reticent for most of the lessons. She did get to the point where she'd blow some bubbles and float on her back, so some progress was made. Henry couldn't get enough swimming all summer, and by request is doing more lessons at Foss this fall.

July 4—5: Staycation in St. Paul

The kids had been begging us to go to another hotel ever since Omaha, so we decided to try something we'd never done: a night at a hotel in town! We settled on the Embassy Suites in downtown St. Paul, which proved to be a good spot. The first order of business was swimming, then we walked to Mickey's Diner for dinner, then back to the room for lots of TV watching. In the morning it was a hotel breakfast, more swimming, and then to lunch at Lord Fletcher's with the Solyntjes clan.

July 9: The Craziest Day of the Summer

I intentionally scheduled the kids pretty full this summer (with breaks built in too), and it worked out great, except for one day. Every activity seemed to overlap on July 9. Franny had a ballet camp start in the morning, then they both had swim lessons in the early afternoon. Franny squeezed in a post-lunch nap, and I gave her the option of going to the final Amazing Athletes session. She wanted to! So we did that in the mid-afternoon, grabbed a quick bite at Wendy's, dropped Henry off at baseball practice, took Franny back home to be with Mom, then went back to pick up Henry. It actually worked out fine, just too much driving time for Dad.

July 9—30: Franny's Frozen Ballet Camp at MCEC

Franny was in heaven at these four ballet classes, dancing to songs from Frozen. I unfortunately couldn't see her while she was dancing, but she was always beaming after class and would show me some moves when we got home. There was 10 minutes at the end of the last class where family got to go in and watch. Pretty adorable. Ballet is definitely her top choice of activities right now.

July 11: Henry & Laura's Tonka Mud Run

July 13: Morrissey

Laura and me tried out this weird thing where we go out without the kids. We saw Morrissey at the Fitzgerald Theater in St. Paul, and it was nice to get out, but we were both a little disappointed with the show. It had its moments, but something was missing compared to the other two times I've seen him.

July 20—24: Henry's Cartoon Camp

This was a four day camp at Scenic Heights Elementary at which Henry drew a different comic book every day. He enjoyed it well enough, but it seemed to just be rote copying of what the teacher showed them to draw.

July 25: Henry & Mama Archery

July 26: Malcolm B-Day Party/Trivia

After a fun birthday at the park for Malcolm, the kids stayed with Grandma & Grandpa while Mom & Dad played some trivia with softball cronies. Good times plus a victory!

July 27—31: Henry's Viking Saga Camp at The Oakshott Institute

This was an all-day, five day camp. It was right up Henry's alley, run by experts on Viking history and featuring history lessons, making his own shield, and Viking-inspired games such as javelin throwing, dodge ball with shields, axe throwing, and sword fights. The downside for Dad was having to fight rush hour traffic way across town twice a day. Henry better hope I forget how much I hated the driving by the time we need to sign up for next year's Oakshott camps. By luck, his buddy Huxley was signed up for the camp too.

August 5: Frances's Princess Art Class at MCEC

A one-morning art class. I screwed this one up a little by telling Frances I'd be staying at the class with her, assuming for some reason it was a parent-child class. All her other art classes had been! But when we got there it was a room full of little girls and one teacher. No parents. Uh-oh. I tried to explain to Franny, but she started melting down, so I told her I'd stay for 10 minutes or so. Cue 10 minutes of awkward sitting in the corner while the young teacher starts the class, but at least Franny is happy and participating. I say my goodbye quickly, at which point she starts melting down again, but I take off. I was 93% sure she would get over it quickly, and we found out later she did. Overall, a success. Maybe a preview of how preschool drop-off will go for awhile.

August 8—15: Solyntjes Vacation at Lake Shamineau

Our families independently both chose lake homes near Brainerd for get-aways this summer, but that was fine with us! We figured we'd end up repeating some of the same activities, but we didn't. Between swimming, playing on the beach, mini-golf, go-karts, fishing, pinball, kayaking, golf, cards, relaxing at the cabin, a campfire, and meteor watching, there was plenty to keep everyone happy. I inexplicably got really sick one day, but luckily no one else did. Franny was very attached herself to Aunt Emily all week! More great family time.

August 17—21: Henry Golf Lessons at Glen Lake

Hard to get much out of Hanky about this camp except that it was "good." He and Franny both liked getting Icees in the clubhouses after most lessons.

August 22—September 1: Aaron, Henry & Franny Trip To Kansas City/Laura Has Too Much Fun By Herself At Home

The end of summer trip to Grammy & Poppy's house seems to be a yearly tradition now, with no activities offered for the end of August and school not starting until after Labor Day. Laura didn't make it down for any of the time this year, but she was happy to have so much time all to herself. She tried out cooking complicated Indian dishes, kayaked the St. Croix River with Jackie, went to a ballet with Jackie, watched whatever movies she wanted, and probably other stuff too. I didn't have it so bad either with built-in babysitters, and got out to a Royals game with just John and a great stand-up comedy festival on my birthday with friends. With the kids, we did the zoo, a Royals game, Deanna Rose Farmstead, Oklahoma Joe's, swimming, pontoon, cards, visited Granddaddy in Liberty, and played with cousins and Grammy and Poppy to their heart's content. Just Henry and Poppy spent a long afternoon at Cool Crest playing mini-golf and arcade games.

September 5: Renaissance Festival

This is the third summer in a row we've gone to the Ren Fest, mostly because there's a few things for both kids that they just love. For Franny, that's the Fairy Forest and the mermaids, and for Henry, shooting arrows, throwing stars, and getting to pick out a souvenir. Franny chose a garland for her hair and Henry a wooden sword. We went with Sarah, Mim, Lottie, and their Grandma Sue and had a good time, if tempered by the crowd and heat. As we fought an exhausted, screaming Franny to buckle up in the car afterwards, we thought it might be OK to take a break from this activity next summer.

September 8: Henry's First Day of 2nd Grade

(And Franny's first day of pre-school coming up on September 15.)

Fran: "I like orange now."

Henry: "Call the newspapers!"

Tipping to One Side

 Well, I guess it was bound to end, but still, not too happy about it. Last weekend I weaned the steroids completely off, and it did not go well at all. I awoke on Saturday morning with a bad headache, stomachache and nauseous (I even vomited).  I  quickly restarted the steroids and slept on the couch the whole morning.  I can remember Franny asking me if I was better, and then I would simply answer "no."  By the afternoon, I could feel the effects of the steroids and I felt somewhat "awake" so I went to Henry's game.  I'm trying to think back on the weekend, and I think I also ate at my parents house, but that is about all.

Man, this somnolence syndrome is really kicking me.  Not only do I physically feel bad, it really wipes out my mental stamina.  I worked on Monday and Tuesday, but Wednesday I was feeling more tired and I skipped something that I was really looking forward to, so I could just sleep on the couch.  When I feel bad, I just felt like I would never get better and I just keep slipping back to exhaustion.  I get so apathetic and down.  I always had a sunny disposition, but not so with somnolence syndrome.

During all of this, there was one thing that bothered me the most, a picture. On back to school night last fall, we met Henry's 1st grade teacher for the first time. At that visit, she took a picture of the whole family.  I look at that picture and I don't even recognize myself. My hair is longer, I seem happy and I seem in shape.  This was before.  Before I knew about the 4cm brain tumor. Before my brain surgery, before my 6 weeks of radiation, before my somnolence syndrome.  I look different because I was different.  I want to be that person again, will I ever?

Now, it's been about a week back on the steroids, and I am feeling okay. I am on the lowest dose that I was before I stopped, and I think I will keep this up for a little bit. My radiation oncologist gave me a half dose to use to slowly stop.  I'll do that next week. For now, I am liking the fact that I am starting to think about planning and what they day and week will entail. I actually made a vacation list for packing and planning (will be leaving in 5 days).

Also, this weekend, we went and watched Aaron play old timey baseball.  It is 1860's rules so there are a couple odd plays.  When you are watching, you are supposed to cheer by saying "Hurruh," so that is what we did. I'm glad Aaron found this team, even if he is the youngest by about 30 years.

Nirvana

 Recently, people have been asking me how I feel. This makes sense, considering what I am going through, but the answer is quite unexpected.

I tell people that I have achieved enlightenment, peace, nirvana. 

I am right now balancing somnolence syndrome, steroids, caffeine and lack of sleep. For some reason, all of these stirred together, lead me with ... a sense of being, alright with the world.

I am still somewhat motivated in life, but for the most part, things are pretty okey dokey.  I just want to keep thing simple, and keep floating over life.  I used to think about the next day, then the next week and the next month.  I am more just thinking about today. What am I going to do today? Should I think about tomorrow? I usually do at around 2am in the middle of the night or so.

This weekend, I slowly plugged away in the kitchen and living room, to not only clean, but purge the excess in my life. I want to live simply and I want to stay in an uncluttered abode.  The thing is, I wasn't even minding the cleaning.  It was the process.

Um, what?  So not me...or is it.

I also feel like maybe I am more gentler and kinder.  When I go into a patient room at work, I am usually very aware of time. Not in a bad way, but in a prompt way.  Now, I am finding myself just sitting back and waiting for parents to wrap up the conversations.  Most of the time, I end up on time anyway without pushing. This leaves me with a little less time between patients, but I manage fine.

I am also being nice to myself.  If I eat an extra cereal bowl before bedtime...big deal.  I will probably make up for it sometime in the future when I start exercising hard again.  If I can't sleep, just get up and find something else to do.  If I need an afternoon caffeine pick me up, so be it!

Maybe this is good, but the truth is, it's not me.

So, I will continue living in this state of enlightenment for maybe a week or so, but then I better get back to my motivated practical self.

Rationality

 Henry had another baseball game today. He has 1-2 games every weekend for the next month or so, so it is no surprise he played today.  In my last post, I guess I was accidently saying t-ball instead of baseball. My apologies.  Henry would be drastically hurt if he thought I didn't know the difference (but I really do).  This game was at a new ball field and the weather was perfect. We got some great pictures and I didn't want to hold back, so I put them all up here. I hope you enjoy them. I mostly will be talking about other things, but the pictures will be good eye candy.

 I am still a really poor sleeper thanks to the steroids.  If in my whole life there has been one thing I have really excelled at, it has been sleeping.  If given the chance, I will take the whole 9 hours and not turn back.  The contrast of a cool room and me tucked beneath my multiple quilts...aaahh...nothing better.  Now I find myself not really able to settle down.  I seem to fall asleep okay (while usually on the couch next to Aaron), and then once I get in bed I just cant stay asleep.  I don't know what to do with myself.  Get up, go to the bathroom, check my phone, lay in bed...aaaaa.... This is not really my kind of fun. To make it worse, Franny is having some issues at night and has been needing comforting. If there is a chance that I am actually asleep, she will wake me up and then everything starts all over again. I know it is the steroids and it makes me even more anxioius to get done with them.  I am starting to really symphathize with poor sleepers.  I want to be out of the club!

Because of these sleepless night, around midnight or so last night, I started thinking about a blog post and how to set it up and what to say and all the intricacies.  Before I forget half of what I wanted to say, I thought I should write it up.  This is a little bit of a departure from my normal posts, but maybe even more important.

I guess I should start out and say that I feel like am a normal, pretty rational person. I don't feel I have many or really any extreme views.  I guess I am a product of how I was raised. Yes, I was a suburban girl, but beyond that, both my parents were raised in smallish towns (is Fargo small?). My mom's best childhood memories are when she got to go the family farm.  She was raised on self sufficiency, hard work and a lot of drive was the key to everything. My grandmother saved EVERYTHING.  Even in my house, I have a hoard of buttons I know my grandmother painstakingly removed off old clothing so they could be used again some day (some have).  I probably have a half a dozen quilts or more that both my grandmother and mother have made. I treasure them because, one they are awesome, and two, they were hand made for ME!

On my father's side, my grandpa was a carpenter, a meticulous one. The summer before college, I spent a week with him building a wooden chest to take to college.  Do you know how many times I had to sand that top of the chest until it was good enough for him?  A long time, but you know what, he was right.  I can look over to the right and see the chest now, in perfect condition.  Beyond this, I also have the bedroom set he made for himself and my Grandma.  All goodness. 

The reason I am bringing this up is not to brag, but to tell you that besides my normal childhood, there was some always special about doing things yourself and if you could, you should.  It is probably the most correct way to life.  I don't have any pretense that it is the easier way, just the right way. 

Now that I am getting older, I feel like there are even more choices about the world, specifically ecologically.  I think there is no way a rational human being can deny global warming. I mean, they can choose not to think about it, but it is there. Things I do, or not do, really impact what happens, and I think there are a lot of small things I can do about it that feel right.

Because we are renting our house here in Minneapolis, we are in a stand still and that has given me (and Aaron) time to reflect on what we want for the future. 

Again, I am not an extremist. I like most parts of government (although they lie too much). I think it is important to support people who were not born into lucky situations. Every day I see the value of Medicaid.  I do no think society is evil. I do not want to withdraw. Yes, the environment is important, but even more important is people and community.  I want to be part of that community, not sheltered away.  I love public schools. They have given Henry so many more opportunities that I could ever give him, and that is the way it should be.  I like technology. I probably use my cell phone too much and am happy about all the access it gives me.  I could never own a farm, or horses or dogs because then I would have an asthma attack and stop breathing.  Oh, the other really important thing is that I believe in science and vaccines. 

Why am I saying such a speech? It is because I am so normal, and I feel pretty strongly about what Aaron I need to do.  We want to get as self sufficient as possible. Tesla just came out with a solar power battery that could let you store energy for your house.  Using gray water in the house to decrease water consumption just makes sense.  Houses are getting bigger and bigger, but people are not really having more kids.  I want to be in the same room with my family while one cooks, the other does homework and the other just goofs off.  Every week we mow our massive lawn, why? The kids play in the cul-de-sac!

I have been trying to research what the next steps are for us.  We will like move to another house in 1 1/2 years or so.  I don't want to build a house, to me that defeats the whole purpose on re-using and where we live there is not much free land.  I want to find a nice smallish house and convert it to be eco-friendly/partially off-grid.

I don't know if I am looking wrong or what, but there is just a paucity of information here. There is a lot of homesteading off-grid information about living far away from society, but what about right about here in the city? My guess is it is just coming on now, and slowly.  I can't be the only person like me, right?

Besides the house itself, I want to be a better gardener.  I by no means have a green thumb, but I am trying and learning. It seems to me polyculture/permaculture makes the most sense on how to set up fruits/veggies in the yard.  There are some local chapters here in Miinneapolis and I am excited to start learning about them. This will likely be more secondary after the house, but when buying a house it has to have the right kind of land. It doesn't have to be big, just right.

We went to the library today and I picked up three books about living off-grid or something like that. I'm not really sure they are the right books, but this is my official start of research. It is time to get real and start acting off what I feel (or more so than before). As of right now, we do about the medium. We recycle, we have a CSA that will be starting soon.  Hopefully we will also get some local eggs. I just found a local meat market that we will frequent, but really we don't eat meat every day.  Before my somnolence syndrome I started biking to work. I hope to restart that soon. I have a meager garden, we'll see what happens with it this year.

I think I also need to say I love my job. It is a great job and very fulfilling and I like going almost every day. I never plan on stopping working, or getting out of the "rat race." Like it or not, my job is part of my identity. Because this job is well paying, I probably have options in the future that are open to me.  I am not unaware of this.  This affords me to do things right, not just cheap.  Actually, I have no idea how much we are taking with finances. I am hoping to learn more down the road. I picture this thing done in stages, hopefully none will be too overwhelming, but who knows. If we find the perfect house with good bones that is unlivable, maybe we would do it all at once.

Okay, okay.   I think I have said my piece.  If anyone has any good resources for me to move forward with, I would be much obliged.  Everyone else can watch the journey.  I'll probably just be reading and researching the next year or so, so it might get  a little boring in the mean time.  Good thing I have some cute kids to keep you interested in this blog.

I guess I will just leave you with some pictures from the end of the game.